While cleaning up some digital files recently, I came across the following meditation. I had written this prayer one October morning several years ago after reading the Old Testament passage for that day in my One Year Bible. Migraines continue to occur and I was particularly struck by my thoughts at the end. There are times, when we are weak or afflicted or shadowed with anxiety, when we may receive revelation or light that, in healthier seasons, might not be visible.
Reading this morning in Jeremiah, Chapters 32 and 33, I was suddenly overcome with a sense of profound gratefulness. I am the spiritual heir of Your promises to Israel. Again and again You plead with Your chosen ones to love You, trust You, serve You. In brilliant—and often graphic—language You entreat a fickle people.
And that word in 32:31 – provocation. I confess to being too easily provoked at times. My impulse, as I look to You, is to pray that I will not live a life that would in any way be a provocation to You. At the same time, I must acknowledge this as a false view of Your Divine character. It is a projection of my own propensities and failings.
I live in grace. The very air I breathe is infused with Your grace. Your unmerited favor is so evident on every side, in every clear and present thing, and in every nuance of my life that it cannot be escaped. Somehow, (and how can this be apprehended?) you will rejoice over me with all Your heart and with all Your soul (32:41).
I am post-migraine this morning, a little unsteady. But sometimes in these frailer moments, a portal can swing open—ever so slightly. The mind drifts farther afield from everydayness, and the spirit reaches ardently (a little desperate, perhaps) for consolation.
And there You are, You with Your rest and reassurance and the day’s revelation*:
THE LORD MY RIGHTEOUSNESS: Full of grace, full of mercy
23:6, 33:16